A verge of sorts.

There's a verge that I'm on. I'm tip-toeing around it and peaking my head over for a better view of what lies below, assessing the drop and asking myself questions about my own bravery. I've been to this edge before. I've never jumped off. I'm not talking suicide, but there's some kind of a death that's involved. It's a killing off of the comfortable self; the part of me that cowers in fear and likes predictability and routine more than adventure and mystery. I'd rather read a story filled with adventure and mystery than one filled with predictability and routine. I'm sure you feel the same. And if my life's going to play out like a story then I better jump off that edge. Tip-toeing is exciting only for a time, and then the tension gets old. Something has to give, and something has to knock me over, so that I can fall into a way of being that I'm meant to be. Coincidences have been happening lately, like in good stories you hear where a person needs to hear a word to confirm a thought they were thinking about something that no one knows about. Well, I've been getting these words thrown into my ears from unlikely places and people who don't know what's going on in my mind. This might sound like madness to you, but that's OK. I don't care. It's beauty to me. It's literal music to my ears. Sing! A woman told me today after a room had filled with silence. She didn't know that I've been wanting to sing and have been challenged by the demon voices that say I don't have a voice, or words to say. I'd say she was an angel, but maybe she was just acting on behalf of one. I will say she was angelic. The open room remained quiet as words and melodies flooded into my thoughts. I could release all of that music and sound into this cavernous cafe. I'd been thinking this before she told me to, "SING!" Coincidences are when God's getting intimate and wants you to know just how far He'll go to let You know that He cares. I'm on the verge of something and there's nothing but darkness below. But I've read somewhere to "jump, and the net will appear." I don't know how far down that drop falls, but now seems like a good time to find out.  Tension's building and this verge of a place is getting too familiar. It's time for a change of location. It's time to ramble somewhere new from now on. 

1 comment:

  1. Psalm 84:5(NIV)
    Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
    whose hearts are set on pilgrimage.